Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "Have you ever caught a dick virus before?" asks Barbie. The teacher blushes and looks wistfully out the window. "Not in a long ... long time," says Mrs. Smith. Barbie realizes she is missing some subtext and decides to solve the problem herself.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
Array starts one of her classic impromptu squishable fights. "I'm sorry Array, but after being courted by 7 different sororities, I'm kind of burnt out on naked pillow fights," says Barbie.
Array starts one of her class…
Array immediately ran to her room to make sure her computer was safe from the dick virus. "I was just so worried about my cat pictures and fireman porn!" cries Array. "That's not how computers work, you idiot" "This is why you can't participate in the hackathon!" says Barbie.
Array immediately ran to her …
Barbie tries to email her ideas to Weston, but suddenly her screen is filled with animated dicks. "That's weird and lightly arousing!" says Barbie. Barbie and Array try to reboot the computer but nothing happens. "Looks like you've got a virus ... of the venereal variety," says Array, lightly chucking at her own joke. "no" says Barbie.
Barbie tries to email her ide…
At breakfast one morning, Barbie is already hard at work on her laptop. “What are you doing, Barbie?” asks Array. “I’m helping design a hackathon at MIT this semester,” explains Barbie. “We really want to get as much participation from the whole campus as we can!”
At breakfast one morning, Bar…
"Your hackathon sounds so fun," says Array. "Can I participate?" "Oh, Rachel, a hackathon is no place for a course 3" Barbie says, laughing, "Course 6 is the only true major anyway!"
"Your hackathon sounds so fun…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "It's only in beta right now but you can play the first level," Barbie says, laughing, "I've already got Steven and Brian helping me find bugs and you can too!"
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
I like to wear pink. It confuses all the nerds and slows down the action potentials in their brain. This means putting up with less mansplaining so that I can focus on more important things like fixing their broken UI implementations and sneaking in View Model change. Did someone say model?
I like to wear pink. It confu…
"Thats unfair"' says Skipper "Just because you are a girl does NOT mean that people should criticize you!" "I know" says Barbie "I wish that people would stop sexism!"
"Thats unfair"' says Skipper …
"Whats wrong," says Skipper. "Are people telling you they hate your website" "No," Barbie says , "People are telling me that I did not code the website and that my boy friends coded it insteted!"
"Whats wrong," says Skipper. …
"Wow" said Barbie once she published her website I have 100 viewers." What is that?" asked Barbie as she saw a picture on her website change into a poster that said " Barbie never coded this all she did was design it". "Oh No, said Barbie " People think that my boy friends created it!"
"Wow" said Barbie once she pu…
When Barbie got up that morning she instantly started work on her websites for kids and how they can find out what future job is just right for them.
When Barbie got up that morni…
"A DVD? Seriously, Steve?" Barbie laughed in that way she always does when some dude thinks he's showing her something she couldn't possibly understand. "Why don't I just boot up this crashed 'wind-woes' PC with my live Arch Linux flash drive and really get to the bottom of things. Oh, and get your fucking hands off the monitor inputs, dude. No one ever falls for that shit."
"A DVD? Seriously, Steve?" Ba…
Hello Mork and Mindy
Hello Mork and Mindy
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "I appreciate the offer," says Barbie. "But I know how to fix stuff on my own." "Ok!" says Steven. "Just let us know if you need help!" "I just told you," said Barbie, "I can do it myself! Just because I am a woman does not mean I require male assistance for every problem. In fact, being a woman means I can do anything I set my mind to!"
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Jesus skipper!! said Barbie. Luckily Skipper hadn't noticed the angry goat porn on Barbies screen.
Jesus skipper!! said Barbie. …
"What the hell, Brian? SCSI cables? What is this, 1985? And seriously? Windows XP? Are you trying to infect these computers? Get out of here and don't come back until you've reached the 21st century!" screamed Barbie.
"What the hell, Brian? SCSI c…
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"I'm only creating the design ideas, and I am going to turn it into a real game!" says Barbie.
"I'm only creating the design…
"I've been working on this independent project for months, but to make a little extra money and expand my portfolio I'm also helping fix some friends computers and manage a few of their smaller websites." Barbie laughs, "and of course there's freelancing for larger established companies. But I prefer to be an indie designer because it gives me more creative freedom."
"I've been working on this in…
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