Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "I reviewed your code and I have some feedback."
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"I can't believe I have to look up regex syntax again," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Brian's help to test it when I'm done!"
"I can't believe I have to lo…
Programming can be very difficult. But in life, you must choose the difficult things you will struggle with, and which you don't. I have chosen the difficult task of creating cute robots that can self-assemble into acrobatic formations, recite French poetry, and perform novel adaptations of classic literature. I can't even remember the stupid things that troubled me before. In programming, we have a term for those kinds of things. We call them "trivial".
Programming can be very diffi…
I am going to do this on my own!
I am going to do this on my o…
Barbie tries to email her design to Steven, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "That's weird!" says Barbie, "Was Ken using this computer? He is always surfing porn sites full of malware." Barbie and Skipper try to reboot the computer but nothing happens. "At least this time it's just a *computer* virus, big sister," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to email her des…
Who the fuck wrote the product criterias and coded this shit? If this got tested professionally, it would be a failure even before release.
Who the fuck wrote the produc…
"Yes, it is really cool." Barbie says. "Would you like to beta test it when it's done?"
"Yes, it is really cool." Bar…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fixed my computer and saved my homework!" Skipper caresses Barbie's neck gently. She is so thankful that Barbie saved the day, how could she ever repay her?
The next morning, Barbie give…
It's 7:00 AM and already Barbie is studying when Skipper gets up. "Good morning Skipper! I would have breakfast with you but I watch CBTnuggets while I'm eating. I have to study constantly, since I get a new certification every month! Have you considered going for your RHCE? Linux admins are in high demand right now, I'm thinking of doing that after I finish my CCNASec and my CISSP."
It's 7:00 AM and already Barb…
Barbie has not slept in thirty-eight hours because the Cloud version of Photosnop is an unstable, clunky, proprietary piece of excrement, and destroyed her vector work no less than five times. She kludged this together in GIMP, and the supervisor will never know. Cloud subscriptions can go die in a fire.
Barbie has not slept in thirt…
Look guys. You gotta close your shits and dicks tags.
Look guys. You gotta close yo…
I engineered this egg to update my Facebook status with my body temperature. Next, I'm planning to use this temperature data to pinpoint my fertility cycle and send private messages to eligible bachelors when I am fertile.
I engineered this egg to upda…
"... and then afterwards, I fry up their brain and serve it in one of my special Barbie tubs."
"... and then afterwards, I f…
Who wrote the product criterias for this shit? If this got tested by a professional, it would be classed as a failure even before release!
Who wrote the product criteri…
Brian, this is a CD. This Macbook pro doesn't have an optical drive, Einstein.
Brian, this is a CD. This Mac…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "It's only an idea right now," Barbie says, laughing, "I have to build the game first!"
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"I thought this was Algorithms 101. Why are you projecting my name in binary?" Barbie asks, "And why are you wearing a labcoat?" "Why are you such a perceptive little shit?" Replies Ms. Smith.
"I thought this was Algorit…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fixed my computer and saved my homework!" Skipper caresses Barbie's neck gently. She is so thankful that Barbie saved the day, how could she ever repay her?
The next morning, Barbie give…
# chmod -x /bin/chmod
# chmod -x /bin/chmod
"JESUS BARBIE WILL YOU KNOCK BEFORE ENTERING" exclaimed Skipper
"JESUS BARBIE WILL YOU KNOCK …
"Typing notes is so early aughts" Says Barbie as she over writers the teacher's binary with her wifi livepen.
"Typing notes is so early aug…
"Holy Fuck! Where did this hurricane come from!" yells Barbie, as the winds picked up in her sister's bedroom. "My laptop! It's blowing away!" cries Skipper. "It's the fucking Flash!" says Barbie. "He's fucking with us again. I'm calling Captain Cold. I ain't got time for this bullshit."
"Holy Fuck! Where did this hu…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fixed my computer and saved my homework!" Skipper careses Barbie's neck gently. She is so thankful that Barbie saved the day, how could she ever repay her?
The next morning, Barbie giv…
Since Barbie knows a lot about open source she could find a disk recovery utility that was just as good as the $90 commercial option Skipper couldn't afford. Luckily Barbies command-line fu is sharp, because there was an edge case in the build script. With a pull-request submitted and Skipper's homework saved Thanksgiving was back on track!
Since Barbie knows a lot abou…
lol, you guys are using Corona? Isn't that cute.
lol, you guys are using Coron…
more (170 pages)