Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"For the last time," Barbie explained, the corner of one blue eye twitching, "The DVD-RW drive is not a cupholder. You don't even have cups this small! Do you have a tiny cappuccino addiction or something?"
"For the last time," Barbie e…
Barbie shares her virus with Steven and Brian.
Barbie shares her virus with …
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "TrueCrypt is fucked. But I'll install VeraCrypt on your computer!" "You better!" Skipper replies as she playfully hits Barbie with a pillow.
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says…
"You STAY OUT of my personal pictures folder!" screamed Skipper. "I was just looking for pictures of puppies. Why do you have a folder called 'Ken (Shower)'?"
"You STAY OUT of my personal …
"Interesting, Brian," says Barbie. "I like your approach to multimethods, but I think your type annotation syntax is overthought and clumsy. Have you looked at Typed Clojure?"
"Interesting, Brian," says Ba…
In computer class, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "I'm having a little trouble with my hobby OS. Do you have any experience writing bootloaders?" asks Barbie.
In computer class, Barbie rai…
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "Why are you writing in binary and why are you dressed like a pharmacist?" asks Barbie.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
After exhausting her search for a medical cause, Barbie began investigating the mind of God through aramaic texts to find a reason for this terrible curse. "Steven and Brian will be frozen forever," Barbie Sighed.
After exhausting her sear…
Barbie tries to email her design to Steven, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "That's windows!" says Barbie. Barbie and Skipper try to reboot the computer but nothing happens. "Let's try Ubuntu instead, big sister," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to email her des…
"If we're using Angular to submit this sign-up form," Barbie offers, "we should utilize ng-messages and potentially some custom directives to validate the fields on the client-side." Steven smiles and says, "Thanks Barbie, that's a great idea! AngularJS is a cool framework." Barbie replies, "You're welcome. And I'm throwing away your Nickelback CD."
"If we're using Angular to su…
"I wrote a new driver for our scanner that writes a .txt file of ascii art instead of a tiff. Let me show you, it's hella rad."
"I wrote a new driver for our…
"evals is slave spelled backwards," said Barbie. "Barbie, what did I tell you about not sharing your conspiracy theories in class?" the teacher angrily asked.
"evals is slave spelled backw…
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "I have to run off to school now. But I promise to find a way to fix your laptop." "You better!" Skipper replies as she playfully straps Barbie to the bedpost.
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says…
"The airport software backup is on this disc," said Barbie, "not on the fucking plane."
"The airport software backup …
Monica you shouldn't be ^5ing me, get your ass back in front of that web cam.
Monica you shouldn't be ^5ing…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Nope." says Barbie.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
They were all ready to make their Internet sextape. "Barbie, you're the Lucky Pierre, but where should Steve and I go?" inquired Brian. "God, do I have to decide everything?" sighed Barbie. "Flip a coin, heads or tails!"
They were all ready to make t…
"Its a complex fluid simulation. Lets use Navier Stokes" says Barbie.
"Its a complex fluid simulati…
"Man, being an assassin is even easier than I thought."
"Man, being an assassin is ev…
This paleo-vegan yoghurt is just the thing I need to get my creative juices flowing. I'll have this code pushed to the cloud in no time.
This paleo-vegan yoghurt is j…
"The whole point was to find a way to practice nuclear war without destroying ourselves. To get the computers to learn from mistakes we couldn't afford to make. Except, I never could get Joshua to learn the most important lesson...."
"The whole point was to find …
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Are you joking?," asks Barbie. "I have a PhD in computing. I think I can fix this virus on my own." "Sorry," mumbles Steven. "I'm just bored because Brian is hogging my pink laptop."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"We took a second sip from a cup we made of bones. The first it was a ruse, a trick so aptly grown," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "The truth is that our youth was a carpet laid with stones. Get the mother fucker on the phone!"
"We took a second sip from a …
Look guys, I've used the Internet and researched myself to find out what I might have done wrong. You won't believe it but I've fixed it myself and I'm only here to prove I don't need your help.
Look guys, I've used the Inte…
"Mrs Smith?" asks Barbie. "Yes Barbie" replies Mrs Smith. ... "WHAT IN COCKING HELL IS UP WITH MY FUCKING LEGS?" exclaims Barbie.
"Mrs Smith?" asks Barbie. "Ye…
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