Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

And Barbie was so happy to get her ITIL certification.
And Barbie was so happy to ge…
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"Oh No!" Pleads Skipper, but its too late. "The third party IP providers have pulled support for the project and enacted an escrow agreement that includes ownership of all character likenesses." Says Barbie. Skipper is sad because Barbie has obviously lost a lot of weight during the legal proceedings.
"Oh No!" Pleads Skipper, but …
Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie."The game files seem to have some corrupted data. Let's work together to recreate them."
Barbie meets with Steven and …
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"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Don't touch ANYTHING!" says Barbie. "Steven," she sighs, "you can't just 'debug all' a running Cisco router." "Sure I can!" says Steven. "The library computer has excellent security software to protect it." Barbie is dumbfounded.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
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"Can Brian and I do anything to help?" offers Steven. "That would be great!" says Barbie. "Steven, can you hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library's computer?" "Sure!" says Steven. "The library computer has excellent security software to protect it."
"Can Brian and I do anything …
"Can you erase all the compromising pictures of me off this silver disk?" Barbie asked Steven shyly as she handed him a Cryptolocker virus. "We sure can, right Skipper?". "Ohhh ya, we sure can" Skipper replied. And Barbie just grinned.
"Can you erase all the compro…
Barbie signs on to Glassbreakers and asks a question about code. She gets so much great feedback and finds so many amazing women to meet, she doesn't have time to go shopping with the guys.
Barbie signs on to Glassbreak…
"'Active Protection System' my slender, improbable ass," sighed Barbie. "This ThinkPad is a piece of crap. At least I can boot off of a live CD distro and RDP into a cracked university host to launch the Anonymous attack. Pour me one of those margaritas, wouldja?"
"'Active Protection System' m…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "Sure, once I finish programming it!" Barbie says.
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"I've just been invite to join Anonymous! Check this out!"
"I've just been invite to joi…
"Same old junk on Hacker News today," Barbie says, laughing. "I guess I will head over to Reddit and see what's happening."
"Same old junk on Hacker News…
"Hey big sis," says Skipper. "Wanna go to Kohl's?" Barbie starts to panic. "Sorry not right now. I got a weird error in this code and I don't have much time before my assignment is due!"
"Hey big sis," says Skipper. …
"Unbelievable, the email I just got from ToKen and BroKen. I have less than two hours to get relnotes written and handed back to the feature team, and these management bobblehead mofos want me to drop everything and create a fucking kanban board. Is crack now available in the fucking vending machines or something?"
"Unbelievable, the email I ju…
z0mg b4rb13 y3w h4v3 r33t sk1LLz!!!!! plu33z3 t33ch m3 t0 h4x t3h m3g4hur7z!
z0mg b4rb13 y3w h4v3 r33t sk1…
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Barbie tries to commit her changes to gtihub. "That's weird!" says Barbie. Barbie and Skipper both looked at the screen. "Looks like we've got a merge conflict, big sister," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to commit her ch…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "Your code looks like fucking spaghetti. I can't follow it. Y'all need to learn some damn OOP and redo this piece of shit."
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"I'm not slacking off", said Barbie, "I'm deploying my code with Puppet!"
"I'm not slacking off", said …
"I'm not sure about this concept artwork" complains Skipper, "It doesn't fit the style of the rest of the game." - When the project missed key COCOMO milestones the art department were the first to be made redundant.
"I'm not sure about this conc…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Oh that's OK!" says Barbie. "Brian, what are you doing! Get your hands off of my work before you mess it up!" Brian shrugs and walks off. "Sorry Steven," Barbie says. "I'm sort of in a one person part of the process but I appreciate the offer."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"You found this on MediaGoblin?" asks Skipper. "Yes, it's this cool multi-media hosting platform where artists can share ideas without involving a giant corporation," Barbie replies. "But how will that make rich people richer?" Skipper wonders, quixotically.
"You found this on MediaGobli…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie as she tries to think of a way to explain classloaders to Steven without hurting his fragile male ego.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
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