Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "No thanks!" said Barbie. I've got a great free virus program on this clean thumb drive. I'll just boot the computers into Safe mode and run the program on each of them!"
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Brian's help to turn it into a real game!"
"I'm only creating the design…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "This will really fool people and let us get into their machines, deposit highly illegal pornography and blackmail them. Yay!"
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"It will go faster if Brian and I stay our of your way," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "Steven, can you and Brian go pick us up some lunch? A cuban sandwich would be great. Skipper is vegetarian so let's get her a veggi sandwich" "Sure!" says Steven. "Awesome!" Says Skipper, "we should be done by the time you get back."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "Steven, can you hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library's computer?" "Sure!" says Steven. "The library computer has excellent security software to protect it." go
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Fuck you- I'm gonna be a hacker!
Fuck you- I'm gonna be a hack…
Today in class, Barbie presents the HTML she had spent months designing. Barbie's terrific computer skills are sure to get her an A! Ms. Smith looks concerned; "Barbie, for the last time, this class is on parallel computations and computational complexity theory, please leave."
Today in class, Barbie presen…

At computer class, Barbie presents her game design to Ms. Smith. She tells Ms. Smith she'll be using Python and Pygame to complete the second half of the assignment, explaining that Python and Pygame is a good language and framework for rapid game prototyping and making simple games.
At computer class, Barbie pre…
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "I have to run off to school now. But I promise to find a way to fix your laptop." "You better!" Skipper replies as she playfully hits Barbie with a pillow.
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says…
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "Why are you projecting my name right now?" asks Barbie.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
1: public static DateTime getTomorrowDate() 2: { 3: Thread.Sleep(24*60*60*1000); 4: return DateTime.Now; 5: }
1: public static DateTime…
Barbie forwards Steven's email to a string of Nigerian 419 scam operators. Afterwards she opens TOR browser and locates a hitman to deal with Brian, paying discreetly with bitcoin.
Barbie forwards Steven's emai…
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Brian's help to turn it into a real game!" "But that 'real game' wouldn't be possible without your ideas!" says Skipper.
"I'm only creating the design…
"We're in," said Barbie. "Nina, you've got five minutes before they trace the connection. But I know you can do it in three. Just long enough for me to eat this yoghurt!"
"We're in," said Barbie. "Nin…
Suddenly, Dr.Schmarbie, in her little girl disguise. jumped out and attacked, "BAR-BIES BLOOD!" she screamed, swinging a big sheet of glass at the back of Barbies head.
Suddenly, Dr.Schmarbie, in he…
"I figured out the math! From now on anyone taking Richard Dawkins seriously will be sucked into the wormhole and transported to the manosphere in the Rigel system, keeping our internet and planet clean! Give me a high five, Brian!"
"I figured out the math! From…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Guys," says Barbie. "why is it so hard to understand the particle updates occur AFTER the field updates? Do you even know what projection is? Do you want to fail this fluid dynamics project?"
After class, Barbie meets wit…
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"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Fuck off, Steven!" says Barbie.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"Heeey girrrrl, you wanna..." "Silence fool," inturupted barbie, "once I crack this mainframe and download the launch codes, you PUA's will be the first to suffer!"
"Heeey girrrrl, you wanna..."…
"How many times I told you guys!" asked Barbie. "Stop watching porn all the time!" she followed. "Let me show you how useful the internet can be!"
"How many times I told you gu…
barbie, please stop drawing nude animals in class.
barbie, please stop drawing n…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "I decided to redo all of your code in Assembly last night. We just saved big on processing power and cut on lag time."
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"Was never a heavy user, but it's still left its hooks in me. As one of my junkie friends put it back then, it doesn't matter whether you're trying it out, chipping, or an addict, heroin takes something from all of us." says Ms. Smith, the teacher
"Was never a heavy user, but …
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