Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"No", cries Skipper. "I'm ashamed to show you my broken Python code because I haven't been writing any functional or unit tests." "Oh dear," Barbie gasps. "Let's get started writing some basic unit tests, and then we'll move on to debugging."
"No", cries Skipper. "I'm ash…
A horrific squish sounded as her body broke and fused. "the interwebz is mineeeeeee!!!" she rasped as she was slowly sucked into the computer.
A horrific squish sounded as …
"Your new design for the program is genius!" exclaims Steven. "Thanks!" says Barbie. "I've been trying to put together something myself, but sometimes the code gets complicated." says Steven. "But now that I know you are an expert at code, I know who to call for help!"
"Your new design for the prog…
Barbie held up a small crystal phial: it glittered as she moved it, and rays of white light sprang from her hand. ‘In this phial,’ she said, ‘is caught the light of Eärendil’s star, set amid the waters of my fountain. It will shine still brighter when night is about you. May it be a light to you in dark places, when all other lights go out.
Barbie held up a small crysta…
"Thank you so much!" says Skipper or whatever the fuck her name is, jumping in glee, "how can I ever repay you?" [refer to Barbie's sexually suggestive face in the photo below]
"Thank you so much!" says Ski…
Steven. Brian. For the last time, I don't have time for your stupid kegger with your neanderthal frat-bros. Go look vapid somewhere else, I'm working.
Steven. Brian. For the last t…
At computer class, Barbie opts to watch cat and dog videos on Youtube instead of paying attention to the lecture. "Intro to Python? What are we - 12?!" Barbie rolls her eyes.
At computer class, Barbie opt…
Suck me
Suck me
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Yeah and remember what happened last time you tried- Steven! Stop messing with the plugs." says Barbie. "Now take this disk and carefully insert it in the disk rom." "Alright, alright, I'll be careful." He replied. "But I'm an engineering major too!" Brian looks over. "Yeah the one who crashed my computer last time you tried to 'help' me download files. I think she's got it," he smiles.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"fite me irl," wrote Barbie on Youtube.
"fite me irl," wrote Barbie o…
After class, Barbie is in a hurrry. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. Are you playing on your phones knowing the deadline for the game is tomorrow ? I had to replace all your JS animations since it was bugging! I'll teach you next time...
After class, Barbie is in a h…
"Your idea seems pretty complicated," says Skipper. "Do you want me to call Brian and Steven to help?" "Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I can't program a game," Barbie says, laughing, "I don't need a boy's help to turn it into a real game!"
"Your idea seems pretty compl…
"I've only just started the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need to finalize those before I start coding so I can make it a real game!"
"I've only just started the d…
"I gave you a simple task, and you didn't fuck it up. High Five!" said Barbie.
"I gave you a simple task, an…
"Wow! You really nailed that plasma effect in no-time!" exclaims Steven. "Better 1337 than n008!" says Barbie
"Wow! You really nailed that …
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Don't you know that we aren't allowed to change any wiring on these machines?", Brian asked. "Yeah right, like I'm going to code on a single screen like an idiot", Barbie mumbled.
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"fite me irl," Barbie wrote into the Youtube comments.
"fite me irl," Barbie wrote i…
"GOD. DAMNIT. Barbie! Stop using my laptop to test implementation of your own crypto! Mom told you to use open-source!" wailed Skipper in irritation. "Christ, ok, if you don't tell mom, I'll build you your own Russian botnet" said Barbie, pressing her fingers into her temples with exasperation. "Promise?" asked Skipper, her excitement growing. "Yeah," muttered Barbie, "...promise."
"GOD. DAMNIT. Barbie! Stop us…
"Oh no! My code isn't working!" cried Skipper. "All those coding lessons gone to waste!" said Barbie.
"Oh no! My code isn't working…
"We killed the old gods," Barbie muttered into a lukewarm serving of pro-biotic, Balkan-style yoghurt, "but even blood sacrifice isn't enough to challenge heteronormativity in the workplace." "I have to do this on my own."
"We killed the old gods," Bar…
"We killed the old gods," Barbie muttered into a lukewarm serving of pro-biotic, Balkan-style yoghurt, "but even blood sacrifice isn't enough to challenge heteronormativity in the workplace." "I have to do this on my own."
"We killed the old gods," Bar…
Barbie makes it to computer class and starts up a conversation with the teacher, a computer engineer. Barbie asks the teacher "Is it true that a college degree is mandatory to be successful?" The teacher responds "No Barbie, I went to a computer engineering trade school and I feel that I am a success."
Barbie makes it to computer c…
"Step aside Steven and Brian," said Barbie. "I need to spoof my source IP address in order to bypass the whitelist on the proxy."
"Step aside Steven and Brian,…
Step aside Steven and Brian, I need to spoof my source IP address in order to bypass the whitelist on the proxy.
Step aside Steven and Brian, …
Hey what are you doing Barbie, shouldn't you be working?" Asked Skipper. "I'm not slacking off, it's compiling." Replied Barbie.
Hey what are you doing Barbie…
more (171 pages)