Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"Is that what I think it is?" asked Brian. "Yup," answered Barbie, "Mattel's corporate email server." She's typing, "We are Anonymous. We are Legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us!"
"Is that what I think it is?"…
Barbie says, "here's Professor Indiana Jones's collection of photos of pottery fragments. Let's see if we can hack together a system to reassemble the pots and see the designs!" Brian says, "that sounds hard!" Barbie replies, "that's why we're doing it!"
Barbie says, "here's Professo…
"Back off Steven and Brian, you both put the Y chromosome in Y2K"
"Back off Steven and Brian, y…
"This damn API documentation is useless!!" Barbie says, while cursing in different languages. "But that is the cheapest company we could find. Are you sure you know how to write code?" replies Skipper as Barbie reaches for a spoon that she will use to disembowel her.
"This damn API documentation …
"It's a UNIX system. I know this." says Barbie.
"It's a UNIX…
"My code is compiling, care for a dance?" "Sure, I can visit the restroom while you fix up warnings."
"My code is compiling, care f…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Not according to Fred Brooks," says Barbie. "Since we're already in the library, why don't you guys read 'The Mythical Man-Month' while I handle this." "Sure!" replies Steven.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Barbie was finally finished installing and configuring her little sister's propriety nVidia driver in Xubuntu. "You fucking had that thing for weeks and you're happy it can just display a screen? You bitch?!" Skipper was not impressed... Typical normie.
Barbie was finally finished i…
Barbie finally installed propriety nVidia drivers on her little sister's Xubuntu 14.04 release. When she finally got rid of all the kernel bugs and instabilities she demonstrated how it all worked to her little sister, "u fukin wot m8?!"
Barbie finally installed prop…
Barbie was busy trying to install the latest distro of fedora-redhat on her old Dell inspiron because she was tired of being locked to a BSD or .NET environment.
Barbie was busy trying to ins…
Barbie tries to install the latest distro from redhat-fedora because she's sick of BSD and .NET based ecosystems but quickly finds her firmware is locked down by shitty UEFI protocols and won't fucking boot anymore
Barbie tries to install the l…
"When I grow up, I want to be a Connected Teacher who breaks down barriers for all of my students and pushes beyond expectations," Barbie says, laughing. "I think I'll start by being a connected student. Check out the video game I am designing for my Kickstarter campaign!"
"When I grow up, I want to be…
"I recovered all the files, and I did it by myself!! said Barbie. "I'm proud of you" answered Steve "Now you see that you don't need my help? Do not feel intimidated for technology stuff!".
"I recovered all the files, a…
"I've finished my game and it rocks," chortles Barbie. "Now the guys are coming over so I can help them. As usual. I don't know why they find this stuff so hard! I'll try not to rub it in."
"I've finished my game and it…
Brian asks, "Is that Mattel's corporate twitter account you're posting to?" Barbie just chuckles and keeps typing.
Brian asks, "Is that Mattel'…
Barbie says, "Steven, do you see how the resolution breaks down on this 2560 monitor? I thought you said you fixed that last week."
Barbie says, "Steven, do you …
"Finally!" Barbie says, "we're ready to go live with the new game. Thanks for setting up that automatic replication, Skip, it makes life so much easier." "It's pina colada time," says Skip. "Should I make some for the guys?" "No, they went home two hours ago," replies Barbie.
"Finally!" Barbie says, "we'r…
"This robot puppy has appealing eyes," said Skipper, "but can't we do better than Steven's and Brian's flat boring rendering?" "My thoughts exactly!" Barbie agreed.
"This robot puppy has appeali…
"That's the last time I fix your Pi for you!" exclaimed Barbie. "Next time you try to install Debian using a staple gun as a driver, don't come crying."
"That's the last time I fix y…
"What the shit are you trying to do, Steve? Stop trying to fucking unplug my computer, you fucking scrub." Barbie sighs in pity. "Here, Steve, go play with this uh, disc...if we need your uh, brains, we'll call you."
"What the shit are you trying…
For fucks sake, Skipper. There must be a helluva turd clogging up our Internet pipes.
For fucks sake, Skipper. Ther…
When Barbie puts her flash drive into Skipper's laptop, the screen starts blinking. "Oh no!" says Barbie. "The virus must be on the flash drive!" "I forgot to back up my homework assignment!" criqwwes Skipper. "And all my music files are lost, too!"
When Barbie puts her flash dr…
"We're trying to build something useful, not play with toys, you silly js fanboys," says Barbie. "I rewrote your cruft in PHP/MySQL and js -- not jquery or angular or react -- and now it's actually working. Lunch is on me, doofuses."
"We're trying to build someth…
These clowns are using node js. Let's get outta here
These clowns are using node j…
Steve and Brian complement Barbie on her 1337 debugging skills. “How do you do it?” they ask in amazement. “It’s mostly about focus” she says without looking up, "but if I were you I’d learn the different between increment and excrement. Your code is crap!”
Steve and Brian complement Ba…
more (170 pages)