User-Submitted Improvements

"Happy birthday, Siri," says (doctor) Charlotte. "Thanks sweety! I'll make sure to eat some cake while writing this articles while giving a lecture," Siri replies.
"Happy birthday, Siri," says …
"Happy birthday, Siri!" says Doctor Charlotte. "Thanks you guys! I'll make sure to eat some cake while finishing my PhD while giving a lecture at Uni," Siri replies.
"Happy birthday, Siri!" says …
"Barbie, what are you doing with that pencil? This is 2015, get with the modern age." said the teacher. "Well, technically I don't need to be here. I put myself as graduated in the gradebook." replied Barbie. "How did you do that?" said the teacher. "Gosh, it was a simple buffer overflow. If you change the p parameter in the main gradebook page, you can overflow it."
"Barbie, what are you doing w…
Thankfully, Skipper learned from her previous mistakes. Not only did she install nude mods on Skyrim, but she also currently runs it with one of those texture mods that closely resemble a Korean MMO. While still dissapointed that Skipper still cannot run Crysis on three seperate windows, she is satisfied that Skipper is doing the best she can with her garbage "gaming" laptop.
Thankfully, Skipper learned f…
"I'd like to introduce this class to a somewhat different operating system called Linux..." The teacher started.
Barbie interrupts, "?'d ?u?t l?k? t? ?nt?r???t f?r ? m?m?nt. W??t ??u'r? r?f?rr?ng t? ?? L?nux, ?? ?n f??t, G?U/L?nux, ?r ?? ?'v? r???ntl? t?k?n t? ??ll?ng ?t, G?U ?lu? L?nux. L?nux ?? n?t ?n ???r?t?ng ???t?m unt? ?t??lf, but r?t??r ?n?t??r fr?? ??m??n?nt ?f ? full? fun?t??n?ng G?U ???t?m m?d? u??ful b? t?? G?U ??r?l?b?, ???ll ut?l?t??? ?nd v?t?l ???t?m ??m??n?nt? ??m?r???ng ? full OS ?? d?f?n?d b? ?OS?X. M?n? ??m?ut?r u??r? run ? m?d?f??d v?r???n ?f t?? G?U ???t?m ?v?r? d??, w?t??ut r??l?z?ng ?t. ??r?ug? ? ???ul??r turn ?f ?v?nt?, t?? v?r???n ?f G?U w???? ?? w?d?l? u??d t?d?? ?? ?ft?n ??ll?d "L?nux", ?nd m?n? ?f ?t? u??r? ?r? n?t ?w?r? t??t ?t ?? b?????ll? t?? G?U ???t?m, d?v?l???d b? t?? G?U ?r????t. ?h?r? r??ll? ?? ? L?nux, ?nd t???? ????l? ?r? u??ng ?t, but ?t ?? ?u?t ? ??rt ?f t?? ???t?m t??? u??. L?nux ?? t?? k?rn?l: t?? ?r?gr?m ?n t?? ???t?m t??t ?ll???t?? t?? m????n?'? r???ur??? t? t?? ?t??r ?r?gr?m? t??t ??u run. ??? k?rn?l ?? ?n ????nt??l ??rt ?f ?n ???r?t?ng ???t?m, but u??l??? b? ?t??lf; ?t ??n ?nl? fun?t??n ?n t?? ??nt?xt ?f ? ??m?l?t? ???r?t?ng ???t?m. L?nux ?? n?rm?ll? u??d ?n ??mb?n?t??n w?t? t?? G?U ???r?t?ng ???t?m: t?? w??l? ???t?m ?? b?????ll? G?U w?t? L?nux ?dd?d, ?r G?U/L?nux. All t?? ??-??ll?d "L?nux" d??tr?but??n? ?r? r??ll? d??tr?but??n? ?f G?U/L?nux..."
"I'd like to introduce this c…
"Wow fuckin really Steven?" Barbie groaned, "This is by far the worst mixtape I've ever heard. You literally recorded snares off an electric keyboard. This is the worst aesthetic music ever, and I've listened to ALL of Brian's seapunk EPs. And holy shit you actually encoded them in .mp3 format? Fucking idiot, christ..."
"Wow fuckin really Steven?" B…
Hey guys - don't you have anything better to do than hanging around me trying to get the answers to the programming assignment?  Seriously - get lost.  The instructions say we have to work independently.  Maybe you should pay more attention in class!
Hey guys - don't you have any…
Okay - the program is all finished, guys.  Glad I could help you out, but one would think that a couple of dudes from Georgia Tech could figure this out!  Next time - you guys are on your own!
Okay - the program is all fin…
Listen - the program is all finished, guys.  Glad I could help, but I would think a couple of dudes from Georgia Tech would be able to figure this out on their own!  Next time - don't expect me to have your back!
Listen - the program is all f…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! You fixed my computer and saved my homework!" Skipper gives Barbie a big hug.
The next morning, Barbie give…
J'aime le furry
J'aime le furry
Barbie tries to email her encrypted unmounted videos to Steven, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "That's weird!" says Barbie. Barbie and Skipper try to reboot the computer but nothing happens. "Looks like you've picked up Syrian RAT again for supporting Palestine, big sister," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to email her enc…
"Jeez Brian, have you even used a TV before?" Barbie cries. "You just jammed one of those RCA plugins into the side of the framing, there isn't even a port there!"
"Jeez Brian, have you even us…
Skipper yells; "I thought the grep command was dumb, but now it just makes sense!" Barbie tells her, "If you like that, wait until I show you how to use curl!
Skipper yells; "I thought the…
Ms Smith tries to scare off the plebs by showing them byte code in binary.
But then Barbie raises her hand and asks: "Wouldn't it be more readable in a normal hex editor?
Ms Smith tries to scare off t…
"Hello, Hello, Hello!" Barbie says to Skipper. "Tell me all your secrets and we'll have lots of fun together!"
"Hello, Hello, Hello!" Barbie…
"What the hell is this, Brian?" Barbie asked while looking at the DVD he handed to her, "Have you ever heard of GitHub?  It's how we share code in 2015.  My laptop doesn't even have a DVD drive!"
"What the hell is this, Brian…
No, please no!!!! Don't install AeroFS in my laptop.
No, please no!!!! Don't insta…
We'll have few more run through meetings in case seven are not enough to figure out what we want!
We'll have few more run throu…
Come on, no more requirements until next Sprint
Come on, no more requirements…
Come on, no more requiriments until next Sprint
Come on, no more requiriments…
Let's have a run-through meeting at 1PM!
Let's have a run-through meet…
Greg, install the fucking drivers and stop trying to steal my monitor
Greg, install the fucking dri…
Shit how do I put my billing information in the mobile app?
Shit how do I put my billing …
Don't hesitate to do the code reviews, Barbie! It's the real fun!
Don't hesitate to do the code…

more (170 pages)