Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"It will go faster if Brian and I get snacks," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "Something without cheese dust. I don't want to have to fix the keyboard too."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"Back off, Barbie... we're starting a CallOfDuty LAN party," said Rod. "LOL! A CD ROM?! Digital download FTW, fool," said UziU. "Researching an archived microfiche database... could you postpone this gamerboy circle jerk," queried Barbie
"Back off, Barbie... we're s…
"IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL"? The hell? Someone tried to wait on a mutex in a DPC! Brian, can you go get me a coffee while I look at this call stack?
"IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL"? The…
"This command-line tool that I wrote should help you trace any bugs you encounter while interfacing with the architecture I designed," said Barbie. "It's easy enough that even a software engineer like you should be able to figure it out."
"This command-line tool that …
"I finished testing your fix to the branch, Barbie, and the bug is gone!" exclaims Steven. "Fantastic!" says Barbie. "I'm going to merge in Git and we'll be ready to release."
"I finished testing your fix …
When Barbie puts her flash drive into Skipper's laptop, it crashes. "Oh no!" says Barbie. "The virus must be on the flash drive!" "I forgot to back up my homework assignment!" cries Skipper. "I'm sorry that happened, sis. Don't worry, I'll help you get the files back!" says Barbie.
When Barbie puts her flash dr…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "You can start by making me a brew." "Sure!" says Steven. "I'll do that and we'll give you some time alone to fix the problem so we don't distract you."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Flute, la WAM UI est encore en carafe ! Et moi qui dois mettre en prod mon nouveau service de location de poney... Comment vais-je faire ?
Flute, la WAM UI est encore e…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "No! One wrong move," warns Barbie, "and this virus could make the nuclear power plant go into meltdown! I can't risk another one of your fuck ups, Steven."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Barbie tries to email her design to Steven, a member of her team, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "Oh no!" says Barbie, "something's wrong with my computer!" Barbie and Skipper try to reboot it but nothing happens. "You may have gotten a virus, big sister," says Skipper. "Did you remember to back up your files?"
Barbie tries to email her des…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. I'm just putting the final touches on my program and updating the software on my sisters computer too.
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"Begone wench!" cried Skipper. "Thou hast installed RegistryCleanerPro upon my computational device for the final time!"
"Begone wench!" cried Skipper…
"I'm starting by creating the design ideas first," Barbie says. "Then I'll work with my team to turn it into a real game!"
"I'm starting by creating the…
"36 hours chasing a Heisenbug, Linus raining insults down on me, and I'm starving and hallucinating. In need a beer, some Pad Thai and an Ambien."
"36 hours chasing a Heisenbug…
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "Maybe I can ask my friends to recommend sites that can help me turn this into a real game!"
"I'm only creating the design…
"While my code compiles I will eat this caffeinated yoghurt," laughs Barbie "Caffeine and coding are a perfect match."
"While my code compiles I wil…
No time to talk. Hacking the planet.
No time to talk. Hacking the…
Barbie showed Steven and Brian that they were idiots by replacing their endless list of loops with much more efficient arrays. "See boys? The file size has halved."
Barbie showed Steven and Bria…
"It's alright guys," says Barbie, "I'm just about done getting rid of all of this spyware you installed, and I installed some anti-malware software for you too. Try to be more careful when you're on those dirty sites, ok?"
"It's alright guys," says Bar…
"I've collapsed that wave function of your simulated schroedinger's cat, and it's a series of concentric circles with gradients."
"I've collapsed that wave fun…
"If your computer gets a virus and crashes, how can you retrieve all the files you lost?" asks Barbie. "Gooogle that shit, Barbie!" says Ms. Smith, the teacher.
"If your computer gets a viru…
"The trick to a perfect high-5 is to look at the other person's elbow!" shouts Steven. "Suck it," says Barbie, "who cares about slapping hands when I just replaced the word ‘game’ with ‘poodle’ in all your IRC logs?"
"The trick to a perfect high-…
"Sucks to be you Skipper - I'm Audi and good luck getting back your illegal downloads!", mocked Barbie.
"Sucks to be you Skipper - I'…
"Barbie, get out of here before the Illuminati catches you!" "Metal doesn't melt at that temperature, Skipper! THINK!"
"Barbie, get out of here befo…
"Barbie, get out of here befor the Illuminati catches you!" "METAL DOESN'T MELT THAT QUICKLY, SKIPPER!"
"Barbie, get out of here befo…
more (171 pages)