Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

HOLD THE FUCK UP GUYS, GOT TO UPDATE MY TUMBLR, FACEBOOK, PINTREST, MYSPACE, INSTRAGRAM, TWITTER AND SNAPCHAT. ALSO FUCK YOU, YOU'RE OPRESSING ME.
HOLD THE FUCK UP GUYS, GOT TO…
"Hey guys!", said Barbie. "I'm trying to lookup 'sexism' but Google must be broken because it keeps linking to this book"
"Hey guys!", said Barbie. "I'…
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. She was only late because she stayed up all night writing an algorithm that largely makes human teachers redundant.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
"C'est bizarre, Eclipse m'indiquait 7 problèmes dans le code à la compilation, j'en ai corrigé un et maintenant, il m'en indique 238 !" interrogea Barbie. "Ha ha, bienvenue en IF" répondit sa marraine
"C'est bizarre, Eclipse m'ind…
Crash Override? "Mess with the best. Die like the rest"?
Crash Override? "Mess with th…
"What are you up to, Barbie?" asked Steven. "Doxxing those asshole racists who spammed your Twitter mentions with racial slurs earlier. EXPECT US MOTHERFUCKAS."
"What are you up to, Barbie?"…
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "Can I use ubuntu instead?" asks Barbie.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
"Oh my god, you guys," Barbie says, "Stop messing with the library computer. I want to play Dragon Age." The guys roll their eyes and give up the computer. Barbie jams the game into the CD drive. "I know, I'm such a blessing."
"Oh my god, you guys," Barbie…
Never send a boy to do a woman's job.
Never send a boy to do a woma…
I'll finish the design after I perfect the game!
I'll finish the design after …
After class, Barbie meets with Alex and Adam at Bahen. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "You know I'd love to play videogames in the CSSU, but I have to work on my computer vision assignment if I want to get into a competitive graduate program."
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"Thanks for helping me design and code my baking blog, Barbie! Now the internet will be able to try my famous butterfly cupcakes!"
"Thanks for helping me design…
Barbie tries to upload her design to Dropbox to share with Steven, but her browser is just hanging. "Oh that rubbish ISP!" says Barbie. Barbie pulls up a chat session to chew out the ISP and pinpoint the source of their problem--basically doing the job for the sys admin--while simultaneously backing up her design onto a thumb drive just in case. In the meantime the ISP takes her advice, clears their DNS cache and Barbie's upload succeeds. "Looks like you should be doing their job too," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to upload her de…
Hi, my gays! How you are you queens today?! Ok, please move sweetie, Barb is gonna do it now. HA thats cute sweetie hilarious, yes Lisa is the best housewife. Ok, can you go get me some Kombucha? I have to do women's work, bitchy big momma coding. Go have a latte ASSHOLES! I dont want to hear your FRENCH CHANTEUSE RIGHT NOW I HAVE WORK TO DO!
Hi, my gays! How you are you …
Brian: That Adam Baldwin is so cool. Steve: Yeah, he sure can act. Barbie: Adam Baldwin is a misogynistic jerk who helped create an atmosphere of hate toward female programmers and gamers. He obviously does not respect women. Brian & Steve: Sorry Barbie, we forgot that he started gamergate. We're gonna boycott him now!
Brian: That Adam Baldwin is s…
"Look, 'Shader Permutation' is not a thing," Barbie says, laughing. "Permutation is a particular ordering of a set. Let's call them 'shader variants' from now on, ok?"
"Look, 'Shader Permutation' i…
So the cable size I would need is 3meters long, the type CAT5e, at less 20… more than enough. And if that’s too much 15 at less
So the cable size I would nee…
At computer class, Barbie presents the game she designed. Ms. Smith Wasn't impressed at all she'll have to give Barbie a zero for the day. Barbie's awful computer skills have ruined the day for both sisters! "I guess I'll never be a computer engineer.." says Barbie sadly before running into the hall. Not even time minutes later she OD on her Oxycontin prescription
At computer class, Barbie pre…
"Then do you mean to tell me, Barbie" said Mrs. Smith slowly, "that you will be unable to recall the aircraft?" Barbie looked sheepish. "That's about the size of it."
"Then do you mean to tell me,…
After class, Barbie discusses the group project with Steven and Brian. "Your incompetence is astounding," she says. "I will do both your assignments myself. At the same time."
After class, Barbie discusses…
In a surprise move today, the PARCC consortium decided on binary as the official language for the HS exam. No time for creativity or the arts, but Pearson says kids are jazzed about this 21st century learning!
In a surprise move today, the…
"Is the code on github?" asks Steven Barbie says "Why, yes, it is! You can just go clone the repository if you want to make your own modifications, but you have to run any changes you want to make by me." "What language is it written in?", Brian asks. Barbie says, "It's in C++ and I use OpenGL for visualizations." Brian says, "Oh, you know, you could have done that using Java3d. I use that all the time." Barbies says, "Well, it turned out that wasn't the best option for what I was trying to accomplish. Thanks though!"
"Is the code on github?" ask…
"I spilled yoghurt on my laptop! Derp-a-derp derp!
"I spilled yoghurt on my lapt…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My Brazzers premium account!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fucked my father and saved my pollo!" Skipper gives Barbie a big dildo.
The next morning, Barbie give…
At computer class, Barbie presents the game she designed and coded, having worked for 15 straight hours without sleeping, thanks to the missed deadlines from Steven and Brian, the slacker male coders she'd hired to do the easier parts. Yet she still managed to get it out the door bug free, and even find the time to blow out her hair and put on her favorite frilly heart top and onyx earrings (and polish up the laptop).
At computer class, Barbie pre…
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