Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

While the boys goofed around, Barbie quietly removed their fucked-up code revisions and replaced them with the code she'd written, which had been tested to destruction back home. Sure, they were treating her like she was fucking invisible, and they were bound to claim the credit for themselves, but Barbie was determined that they were going to pass this assignment.
While the boys goofed around,…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. I'm just finishing up my biotechnology project before dinner. Would you like to see my 3D organ prints? :Computer-aided tissue engineering is the wave of the future!
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"Ah, here's the problem, Steven!" Barbie said. "You didn't declare your integer value properly!" Barbie then reminded Steven to always comment his code.
"Ah, here's the problem, Stev…
"Physical media?" says Barbie. "What do you think this is, 1990?" "Sure!" says Steven. "I thought you could, you know, compute with it." Barbie sighs, "Steven, you're an idiot."
"Physical media?" says Barbie…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. She types 'sudo rm -rf /' into her terminal. "I think I fixed your laptop."
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"All right," says Barbie, cracking her slender fingers manfully. "Time to really blow this prot-spec pally wide open. You guys wanna run Naxx?" She takes a swig of Monster and belches. Steven and Brian look on in horror.
"All right," says Barbie, cra…
Barbie cracked into her Chobani while WoW booted up. "We about to get crunk up in here. Eyebrows on fleek. Da fuq," she said with a smirk. Meanwhile, somewhere in Stormwind, a ten year old playing a human paladin buys some mats off the auction house, never realizing that in an hour's time, he'll be crying hot tears of shame and helplessness as his toon is repeatedly murdered in Alterac Valley.
Barbie cracked into her Choba…
Ohh Barbie.... you belong in the kitchen, not doing man work!
Ohh Barbie.... you belong in…
It's hard to do your best programming work on an empty stomach. I always eat a healthy breakfast before sitting down to code.
It's hard to do your best pro…
Barbie tries to email her design to Steven, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "That's weird!" says Barbie. Barbie and Skipper try to reboot the computer but nothing happens. "Looks like your laptop isn't pink enough" says Skipper "Everyone knows that girls' laptops have to be pink".
Barbie tries to email her des…
Sorry guys, I can't do the "flirting" thing right now. Oaklands bus is crashing again and I need to sift through these 9 conflicting solutions the vendor provided to decide which one will cause the least damage.
Sorry guys, I can't do the "f…
"Aw, come on.. if you're going to bring up a password dialogue, give it focus!" Barbie stabbed at the tab key, without noticing she had now highlighted CANCEL. "GODDAMMIT. You clown shoes motherfucker!"
"Aw, come on.. if you're goin…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "Yes," says Barbie, "You can test it out. I'd be interested in getting feedback on the user interface. I'm worried it might not be intuitive enough. Also, since you have a lot experience with html, css and php, I was wondering if I could recruit you to build the website for the game."
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"Jesus-fucking-Christ Brian!!! Why the hell is this ability system recursive? Here, let me fix this," bellows Barbie.
"Jesus-fucking-Christ Brian!!…
It's a UNIX system. I know this!
It's a UNIX system. I know th…
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "I have to run off to school now. But I promise to find a way to fix your laptop." "You better!" Skipper replies as she hits Barbie with a pillow. ”If not, this pillow will be super-glued to your face tonight while I reformat your hard drive and install Windows ME!"
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "I'm only creating the design ideas right," Barbie says, laughing, "I'll need to lead a software-engineering team to turn it into a real game. I'm hiring Maggie Epps as my developer and Jane Hanley as my product manager."
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"It will go faster if we all work together," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "Steven, can you hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library's computer?" "Sure!" says Steven. "The library computer has excellent security software to protect it."
"It will go faster if we all …
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "If this book is actually about how girls CAN'T be computer engineers, then why do they have a woman teacher?" asks Barbie. "That's a very good question, Barbie. You see, women are only allowed in male professions if it's to TEACH that profession." "Oh!" it dawned on Barbie. "I get it now!"
Barbie makes it to computer c…
“I had no idea Barbie could type one-handed on two computers at the same time! That's so cool!” exclaims Steven. The boys are impressed.
“I had no idea Barbie could t…
"Man that Brian sure is a colossal fuck up! Who passes the same object around to over 2700 classes and thinks that's a good idea? Man it's a good thing we fixed his shit, eh Steven?" says Barbie.
"Man that Brian sure is a col…
"These sketches are great," says Skipper. "Can I help you with some storyboards?" "Yes!" Barbie says, laughing, "Let's plan out a whole level."
"These sketches are great," s…
lets use this ipod cord to connect these laptops... *stephen and brian take pictures of the stupidity*
lets use this ipod cord to co…
"Who put this puppy and rainbow shit on my laptop?" Barbie said.
"Who put this puppy and rainb…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian to help with their new app that keeps crashing. "Whoa, hold up guys," says Barbie. "I'm seeing calls from a bunch of different threads. You know this data structure isn't threadsafe, right?"
After class, Barbie meets wit…
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