Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

... the Old or Ancient Ones, the Elder Gods, of cosmic good, and those of cosmic evil, bearing many names, and themselves of different groups, as if associated with the elements and yet transcending them: for there are the Water Beings.
... the Old or Ancient Ones, …
After extensive A/B testing, Barbie has nailed down the problem with the UX of her new project. Time for a brainstorming session with Skipper to come up with solutions!
After extensive A/B testing, …
"Whatever bitch", Steven interjected. "Brian was just being nice." Barbie sighed and resigned herself to the conversation. "No," she replied. "No, he wasn't. He was trying to fuck me. He was marginalizing what I am capable of."
"Whatever bitch", Steven inte…
ANYTHING. LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE BESIDES THIS DRIVEL.
ANYTHING. LITERALLY ANYTHING …
"No Barbie, you can stop copying my code off of my computer screen. I use github now," said Skipper.
"No Barbie, you can stop copy…
The next morning, Kari gives her sister a big surprise. Kari turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost photos!" cries Michelle. "You are just too cool, Kari! you fixed my computer and saved my photos!" Michelle gives Kari a big hug.
The next morning, Kari gives …
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "I have to go to work and face constant judgement about issues that have nothing to do with my ability to do my job in hopes that someday I can help make it possible for you not to endure this bullshit." "You better!" Skipper replies as she playfully hits Barbie with a pillow.
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says…
Sarah: "Did you know that Alloy is a modeling language based on a first-order relational logic with transitive closure? It translates the input model into an equisatisfiable Boolean formula and uses an off-the-shelf SAT solver to generate a satisfying instance or an unsatisfiable core. It is sound and complete up to the bound on the size of the domains in the universe, and it is fully automatic!" Alice: "Yay~ Let's hug and kiss"
Sarah: "Did you know that All…
I only put on the glasses so I can see the detail on this screen, who knew you could get 4k porn
I only put on the glasses so …
"Barbie, you passed. The rest of you will work for Microsoft." said Ms. Smith. "This is MISANDRY!" cried Steven from the back of the class. "01110011 01110101 01100011 01101011 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01100010 01100001 01101100 01101100 01110011!" said Barbie.
"Barbie, you passed. The rest…
At computer class, Barbie presents the game she designed and programmed by herself. Ms. Smith is so impressed that she gives Barbie extra credit! Barbie's terrific computer skills have saved the day for both sisters! "Now all I need to do is add iAP and get rich!" says Barbie happily.
At computer class, Barbie pre…
"Wait...is Barbie typing on two keyboards?!?!" asked Mark. "I don't know, I'm too busy staring at my reflection" Steve replied.
"Wait...is Barbie typing on t…
Envoyer un RIB, c'est tout simple. Cyrille, vient voir je te montre.
Envoyer un RIB, c'est tout si…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Great but the computer won't even turn on" says Barbie. "Steven, can you plug in barbies computer while I get rid off the the viruses and malware on barbies laptop?" Says Brian. "Sure!" says Steven. "Barbie you really need to stop visiting these self computer sites just cause they have kitten pictures on them." says Brian. (Barbie smiles and giggles a little) "oops" says Barbie.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"I don't get it, Skipper," says Barbie. "Why does Facebook keep showing me ads for makeup and engagement rings?!"
"I don't get it, Skipper," sa…
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JOHN MADDEN JOHN MADDEN JOHN …
Steven, why are you jamming that old-school VGA port into a random blue box and what the fuck is this AOL CD doing here!? These laptops look like they are from 2001! I can’t program on this shit. Christ, I’m transferring to Waterloo.
Steven, why are you jamming t…
Using my 733t h@x0r skillz I've managed to fill this shitbird #gamergate doxer's laptop with kiddy pr0n. During his next match of CoD BLOP 2 I'll SWAT his ass!
Using my 733t h@x0r skillz I'…
I program in the kitchen with the other women
I program in the kitchen with…
"I've got Skipper's virus to load onto the intranet via an inconspicuous sub drive, it will siphon the half cents off of everyone's paychecks and load it into our third party accounts located in the Cayman Islands!" exclaims Steven. "Gimme some skin!" says Barbie. "And can you finally afford the ransom ISIS has for your cousin, that the US govt refuses to pay?" "I've got everything," says Steven. "And more. Now we can skip town and move to a country that is truly free..Canada!"
"I've got Skipper's virus to …
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I don't know why this book is called Computer Engineer when I'm obviously an asset creator" "Lol ass-et," said Skipper.
"I'm only creating the design…
steven please go and listen ro frozen songs and diee hahah," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll don't need Steven's and Brian's help to turn it into a real game!"
steven please go and listen r…
I LOVE MUSHROOM
I LOVE MUSHROOM
"Sorry, guys," says Barbie. "My dad managed to mess up his laptop. I keep on telling him not to download free toolbars..." "God, parents." Steven says. "Say no more. Do you think you'll have the code done by tomorrow?" "Yeah," Barbie replies. "I just need those assets for the UI, so I can test everything before turning it in." "Aw, man. I forgot about that," Tom says. "My bad. I'll get them to you tonight."
"Sorry, guys," says Barbie. "…
Every time I call these IT guys they always have a little smirk on their faces.
Every time I call these IT gu…
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