Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"I said I need a token, but I was just talking about the network protocol!" explained Barbie patiently.
"I said I need a token, but I…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. "I bought you your own set of technical tools. I'm going to teach you how to reinstall your hard drive."
The next morning, Barbie give…
"Whatever bitch," Steven interjected. "Brian was just being nice." Barbie sighed and resigned herself to the conversation. "No," she replied. "No, he wasn't. He was trying to fuck me. It's an important distinction. Additionally, he was being superior and marginalizing what I am capable of."
"Whatever bitch," Steven inte…
Skipper flung herself over her laptop in a vain attempt to hide her tentacle porn. The sound however, was still at full volume.
Skipper flung herself over he…
“I’ve got Skipper's assignment from the hard drive!” exclaims Steven. “A school is a factory for creating workers,” sighs Barbie. “I can’t wait for the collapse of late capitalism.” “Me neither!” exclaims Steven. They high five. One day, kids.
“I’ve got Skipper's assignmen…
"Your puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play with him?" "Oh, he's not here right now" Barbie says, laughing, "Steven and Brian has been taking care of him this week while I finish programming this game!"
"Your puppy is so sweet," say…
Barbie sighs frustratedly at the third pull request. "Seriously, you fuckasses," she mutters, glaring at them, "it's called variable naming conventions. Quit the sweaty high-fives and code better."
Barbie sighs frustratedly at …
COLLAR HACK ?
…
"I'm creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Carla's help to turn it into a real game!"
"I'm creating the design idea…
Barbie tries to test her physics engine tweaks, but then realizes that Steven broke the build right before going offline for the day. "Honestly, how does 'fixed stuff' qualify as an appropriate check-in comment, anyway?"
Barbie tries to test her phys…
"Jesus screaming Christ, Barbie," says Skipper. "Is this the new simplified Gnome 4 user interface?" "It will be, once I remove eyes and ears too."
"Jesus screaming Christ, Barb…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie. "Let's start with the foot pedal - why isn't it working?"
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Barbie tries to email her design to Susan, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "That's weird!" says Barbie. Barbie and Skipper try to reboot the computer but nothing happens. "Looks like you've got a virus, big sister," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to email her des…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fixed my computer and saved my advanced calculus homework!" Skipper gives Barbie a big hug.
The next morning, Barbie give…
"Tee-Hee", giggles Skipper. "I told you that we could earn a lot of money by installing that webcam and charging a subscription!"
"Tee-Hee", giggles Skipper. "…
Barbie accidentally discovers her friend is into some weird shit.
Barbie accidentally discovers…
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I know this, it's a unix system
I know this, it's a unix syst…
"It's weird that you like computers and stuff", Brian said. "I mean, it's cool I guess. You could do...like...apps or something." Barbie gave a quick terse smile then returned to typing. Brian continued. "I mean, you just seem too hot to be into that." Barbie paused and collected herself before replying, "I'm a bit busy. Unless you can help me figure out why my spreadsort is crashing in Gentoo, then I really don't have time."
"It's weird that you like com…
Nice display! I bet it looks crispy in the dark.
Nice display! I bet it looks …
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Susan and Becky's help to turn it into a real game!"
"I'm only creating the design…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it boots systemd! "My GNU/Linux laptop!" cries Skipper. "What the fuck did you do to it?"
The next morning, Barbie give…
Brian and Steve are totally unaware that the DVD Barbie is holding contains video footage of them having sex with the gym teacher under the bleachers.
Brian and Steve are totally u…
Barbie flashes her teacher a winsome smile with the hope that she'll be excused so she can figure out what is wrong with her legs.
Barbie flashes her teacher a …
In computer class, Barbie presents her game. "Wow, that's super lame," the teacher laughed. "But I'm holding my clipboard backward, so whatever." The teacher gave everyone lollipops and stickers while they played Barbie's lame game.
In computer class, Barbie pre…
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