Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"I don't know how to work this thing," said Steven. "All good," said Barbie. "We just need to hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library computer." "Thanks, Barbie!" says Steven. "I'm such a luddite when it comes to this tech stuff."
"I don't know how to work thi…
Barbie tries to email her design to Steven, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "Bloody hell can't believe xorg server stopped working third time today. Did you forget to rebuild nvidia drivers using new kernel headers?" says Barbie. Barbie and Skipper try to restart the gdm but nothing happens. "Looks like we're typing one in Mutt, big sister," says Skipper.
Barbie tries to email her des…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven "Touch that cord again and I'll end you with this outdated data storage device I'm holding." says Barbie, before returning to the laptop and getting the job done.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Tyrone and Nathan, gritted there teeth and tried to give constructive criticism to Barbie's presentation. "You know Barbie" Tyrone started, "it would help a lot if you focused more on ad targeting requirements and less on pictures of yourself". "I knew you would say that." Barbie replied. She wasn't listening, knowing that it is better to look busy than actually be busy, Barbie was busy searching for overly-complex animated gifs for her presentation and spending a month's salary on a pair of shoes.
Tyrone and Nathan, gritted th…
"After this oil, all we have left is these three oranges. I'm so hungry." "Don't worry Skipper, I'll break into the deathbot programming any day now. Someone will come."
"After this oil, all we have …
"Do you have any idea how hard it is for your entire identity to be relative to someone else? 'Skipper is like Barbie but what? Has brown hair? I put a streak of purple in my hair to feel different. Fuck it, this is my fursona, this is my life," Skipper said.
"Do you have any idea how har…
Brian offers to help Barbie in outwardly polite way, but everyone at the table can hear the condescension in his voice. "That's OK" Barbie replies evenly unsure what lie she can tell Ernest to suggest they move to a different lab.
Brian offers to help Barbie i…
After class, Steven and Brian find Barbie in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "No time for football! I need to get back some lost files and repair these laptops."
After class, Steven and Brian…
FROYO LOL
FROYO LOL
"Right now I'm only working on the process optimization," Barbie says, laughing. "Efficiency is important! It will allow me to effectively tackle any debugging issues we may have. Steven and Brian aren't experienced in this kind of coding so it's up to me to make the game more robust!"
"Right now I'm only working o…
"I warned you," screamed Skipper. "I warned you what would happen if you said one more fucking word about node.js. TIME TO DIE PUSSYFACE."
"I warned you," screamed Skip…
'What do you mean you've got no space left?' asked Barbie. 'Delete some crap and let's install Team Fortress 2!' 'No!' cried Skipper. 'Leave my cat photos alone!'
'What do you mean you've got …
"I'm designing the way people will interact with the program visually," Barbie says, laughing. "Then I'll write some bad ass HTML and CSS, and hand it off to Ella to wire up the backend in Rails!"
"I'm designing the way people…
I am going to finish my Greek yogurt before I start work programming a new game. Not only do I have to be smarter and work harder than my male peers to be treated equally at work, I have to stay trim for society to find me valuable outside of work.
I am going to finish my Greek…
"I'm finally done with the design and basic program," Barbie says, laughing. "Steven and Brian are now beta testing to see if it runs smoothly!"
"I'm finally done with the de…
"I pushed those new commits to git yesterday but they are not showing up on my cloud repo" said Manny. "Something about clouds and computers does not sit well with me" says Barbie. "It's okay barbie, next week I will rewrite my app in Angular JS with a wild boar back end and install nginx on solaris. It will run great" says Manny.
"I pushed those new commits t…
At computer class, Barbie presents the game she designed. Everyone wants to play! Ms. Smith is so impressed with Barbie's use of Game Theory that Barbie receives extra credit for her research!
At computer class, Barbie pre…
“Why have Steven and Brian photoshopped my face onto pornographic photos, and posted them online, along with my home address?” asks Barbie. “I should think that's obvious,” answers Ms. Smith. “It’s about ethics in games journalism.”
“Why have Steven and Brian ph…
At computer class, Barbie presents the game she designed. Ms. Smith is so impressed that she gives Barbie extra credit! Barbie's terrific computer skills have saved the day for both sisters! "And I did it all on my period!"
At computer class, Barbie pre…
Skipper notices Barbie having difficulties with her computer. "What's wrong Barbie?" asks Skipper. "Oh, my computer seems to have locked up." Barbie replies. "Have you tried turning it off and back on again?" asks Skipper. "That was it! Thanks, Skipper!" Barbie replied joyfully.
Skipper notices Barbie having…
"What the holy everloving fuck?" exclaimed Barbie. "Did you two even bother running unit tests to make sure your property-level validation attributes weren't missing? Yeah, ha ha, Steven, let QA deal with it AGAIN."
"What the holy everloving fuc…
"I can't believe you read my fanfic!" Skipper cries, trying to hide the screen from Barbie. "I can't believe you ship Stony," Barbie said. "You really are hopeless, sis."
"I can't believe you read my …
If I turn the brightness up really high it is almost like my Easy Bake Oven
If I turn the brightness up r…
"I'm writing a virus to send to Ken's computer!" said Barbie as she hacked away on the keyboard. "I'm teaching myself most of what I need to know, and I want Ken to learn that girls can code too!"
"I'm writing a virus to send …
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "Oh look, you're missing the intermediate certificate used to authenticate your certificate. I'll fix it." Steven sighs and says "Thanks!"
After class, Barbie meets wit…
more (171 pages)