Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

"What is this, Brian!?" asked Barbie. "Have you ever heard of GitHub? It's how we share code in 2015! My laptop doesn't have a DVD drive."
"What is this, Brian!?" asked…
"What is this, Brian!?" Barbie asked. "Have you ever heard of GitHub? It's how we share code in 2014. My laptop doesn't even have a DVD drive."
"What is this, Brian!?" Barbi…
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "If it's too hard for women to do any of this, why are you teaching us?" asks Barbie.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
"This laptop is my workhorse" said Barbie proudly, "I have vagrant running four VMs and Jenkins in the background and you don't even hear the fans"
"This laptop is my workhorse"…
Barbie was stuck trying to make things collide at 3 am. "WHY DID WE CHOOSE GAMEMAKER FOR THE GAME JAM KEN??" she said. "Fenix Rage lolololol" answered Ken.
Barbie was stuck trying to ma…
"Need any help ?" asked Steven. "No thanks", said Barbie. I'm doing the HTML template with my left hand and the CSS with my rigth, so there's no spare keyboard. "What about the javascript ?" asked Brian. "I'll just bang my head on the desk" replied Barbie.
"Need any help ?" asked Steve…
"I can't believe it, Skipper. Someone's written yet another Javascript framework. I need that like I need a fucking hole in my head."
"I can't believe it, Skipper.…
"You see, that's why you suck at Emacs," said Steven, "your fingers aren't abnormally long and insanely flexible, like mine."
"You see, that's why you suck…
"Chin up, boys, your hearts were in the right place. You are not the first guys to try to code Risk 2210 in Visual Basic," Barbie said.
"Chin up, boys, your hearts w…
Skipper hugged and twisted, just like the strange man taught her. Barbie's neck snapping sounded like a kernel of popcorn crunching.
Skipper hugged and twisted, j…
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fixed my computer and saved my homework!" Skipper gives Barbie a big hug.
The next morning, Barbie give…
When Barbie puts her cd drive into Skipper's laptop, the screen starts blinking. "Oh no!" says Barbie. "The virus must be on the flash drive!" "I forgot to back up my homework assignment!" cries Skipper. "And all my music files are lost, too!"
When Barbie puts her cd drive…
After class, Steven and Brian shows up in the library. "Sorry dudes," says Barbie. "I'm busy writing prepared statements and stored procedures into the SQL server code on the library network. The administrator on campus is such an amateur. He didn't even know how you DDOSed the server last night. And for what reason? Accessing Brenda's private pics? you guys are so premature..."
After class, Steven and Brian…
"No unit tests?" Barbie muttered as she furrowed her brow. She continued, "And what are you even trying to do on line 62? Do you even understand - like, conceptually - what bit-shifting is?" Kevin's code review is not going well. "Nah, son - take that weak shit back to DeVry". Later, Kevin's phone lights up with a new notification: "@barbie has closed your pull request".
"No unit tests?" Barbie mutte…
Danny makes it to cooking class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Danny raises her hand. "Yes, Danny?" asks Ms. Powell, the teacher. "If your salad gets the wrong dressing and tastes bad, how can you keep the tomatoes?" asks Danny.
Danny makes it to cooking cla…
"Skipper, what are you looking at?" Barbie asks her cute little sister, walking up to her. Skipper leaps in front of her laptop. "Nothing, Barbie!" Barbie, suspicious, pushes Skipper out of the way. "Is that Benedict Cumberbatch? Why is he kissing that other guy from Sherlock? What is this... Tumbl-r?" Skipper hugs her laptop. "It's called Johnlock, you uncultured swine!"
"Skipper, what are you lookin…
"Goddammit!" Barbie shouts. Skipper, a little disturbed, continues pouring an unspecified, nearly-colorless juice into her cup. "Barbie, are you all right?" "Of course not, you idiot. Our parents are missing, most likely dead, the economy's in a state of emergency, my flawless hair has too much mass for my head, and Assassin's Creed IV just crashed, right when I was about to board a loaded ship!"
"Goddammit!" Barbie shouts. S…
"I'm so glad that we're all equal partners on this project," Brian says, typing on his pink computer, which is societally acceptable for a boy to have (in the perfect world.) Barbie nods in agreement. "Yes! Ms. Smith'll definitely give us an A." "Oh, yeah, Barbie, thanks for helping me with the AI on our game," Steven says gratefully. "You're welcome, Steve," she replies. "I took a class specifically on AI, so I'm pretty good with it."
"I'm so glad that we're all e…
After class, Barbie meets with Steven and Brian in the library. "Hi, guys," says Barbie. "Hi, Barbie," Steven says, blushing a little. "Listen, I wanted to ask you if you could help me with my game, that I'm making on my computer." Barbie smiled. "Sure thing!"she says, hooking Steven's computer up to hers.
After class, Barbie meets wit…
"I'm doing the whole coding on a software programming language," Barbie says, laughing. "Steven and Brian have even asked my help to turn their games into good ones too!" Barbie thought that choosing Computer Science and Software Engineering for her degree was the best decision she ever took.
"I'm doing the whole coding o…
10010100001000010001011111100101000101 such binary very code wow
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Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, The teacher calls barbie. "Yes, Ms.smith" asks Barbie. "If your computer gets a virus and crashes, how can you retrieve all the files you lost?" asks Ms.smith.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
Fuck recipes of husband-approved dishes! I'm learning Python the hard way!
Fuck recipes of husband-appro…
The next day, Barbie farted on Skipper's laptop and it worked! ''Thanks Barbie!'' said Skipper. ''My farts are magic.'' said Barbie.
The next day, Barbie farted o…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "Of course!" says Barbie, handing the computer to Skipper.
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
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