User-Submitted Improvements

"I think I can see the problem Brian, you haven't properly sanitised your database inputs and Steve's surname is '); DROP TABLE users;" sighed Barbie, visibly disappointed in Brian.
"I think I can see the prob...
"Barbie, why do you only wear glasses in this panel?" asked Steven. "That's a bit inconsistent, isn't it?"
"Barbie, why do you only we...
Skipper was sitting alone in her room when suddenly Barbie bursts in unannounced; Skipper quickly clutches her laptop to her chest to stop Barbie seeing what's on the screen.
Skipper was sitting alone i...
"It will go slower if Brian and I help you " so do it by your self Steven. poop s ???? whill talking Barbie says "Steven, can you hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library's computer?" no !Steven. "The library computer has a stupid  security software to protect it."
"It will go slower if Brian...
Barbie sits down in her computer class, where there are no safety hazards at all. She raises her hand and asks the teacher: "Miss, why are you wearing a lab coat?"
Barbie sits down in her com...
"I'll just hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library computer..." said Steven. "Why the hell would you do that?" asked Barbie, "They're still running Windows XP!"
"I'll just hook Skipper's h...
"As you can see, the first line is always 0, the second one is always 1, and then we have 000010,100011,100101,000101,010011,00101"

     "I wish Ms. Wassell didn't only read ones and zeros" said the class, without a clue they were looking at soviet nuke codes.
"As you can see, the first ...
"Why the **** isn't my code compiling!?" says Barbie.

"Maybe it's because you're using ML," suggests Skipper, "you've probably just missed a bracket or something."

"Really!? Because the error messages don't bloody help!"
"Why the **** isn't my code...
Skipper scrambled to hide her laptop screen, but it was too late: Barbie saw everything.

There was only one thing Barbie could say.
"Not you too!"
Skipper scrambled to hide h...
Alan Mycroft: "In ML, curried functions can take functions as arguments and give you back another function which takes a function to give a function."
 
Barbie: "Why the **** did I come to Cambridge..."
Alan Mycroft: "In ML, curri...
"Oh my gosh, you have fever," says Barbie. Her sister cries, "but I don't want Java! I want ML and tail-recursion and immutable data."                                                                                 
            Her sister has never been seen at Barbie's apartment again.
"Oh my gosh, you have fever...
"I'm so sorry, Tick 3," says Barbie. "I have to run off to Java now. But I promise to find a way to solve you." "You better!" Tick 3 replies as she playfully ****s Barbie with a *****.
"I'm so sorry, Tick 3," say...
"So you see, class," says Ms. Smith, the teacher. "The binary distinction of 1s and 0s is a social construct designed for the perpetuation of white cisgender male values."
"So you see, class," says M...
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Great!" says Barbie, "I'll suck your cocks after you're done!". "Steven, can you hook Skipper's hard drive up to the library's computer?" "Sure!" says Steven. "The library computer has excellent security software to protect it."
"It will go faster if Brian...
"Why is the FBI here?" asked Brian.
"Why is the FBI here?" aske...
"I've got Skipper's assignment from the hard drive!" exclaims Barbie, because she doesn't need Steven. "Fantastic!" says Barbie. "And her other files, as well?" "I've got everything," says Barbie, because, again, she doesn't need Steven.  "Now I, Barbie, will retrieve the files from your hard drive. Both laptops will be as good as new in no time!" Steven proceeds to high-five Barbie because she is a good friend, talented, and a hard worker.
"I've got Skipper's assignm...
At computer class, Barbie presents the game she designed. Ms. Smith is so impressed that she gives Barbie extra credit! Barbie's terrific computer skills have saved the day for both sisters! "I guess I can be a computer engineer!" says
At computer class, Barbie p...
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Do you know the signs of computer related autism miss? Reading text in binary is one of them."
Barbie makes it to computer...
The next morning, Barbie gives her sister a big surprise. Skipper turns on her laptop--and it works! "My lost assignment!" cries Skipper. "You are just too cool, Barbie! you fixed my computer and saved my homework!" Skipper gives Barbie a big hug.
The next morning, Barbie gi...
"This disk contains a virus that will shut down the electrical grid for 3 years, let's see what happens when the world doesn't have internet MUWHAHAHAHA!" Barbie threw the disk at Dave the Janitor.
"This disk contains a virus...
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "I have to run off to school now. But don't worry about your latptop, I'm a bad bottom computer programmer so I'll have it fixed in minutes."
"I'm so sorry, Skipper," sa...
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "It's not a game!" Barbie laughed. "The robot puppy is a specially designed virus that will infiltrate the governments inner workings."
"Your robot puppy is so swe...
"Brain had the same problem with his computer last week.," offers Steven.
"Sure did, it sucked," responds Brain, "Do you want me to look at it for you?" "I'm pretty sure I figured out the problem, but you're more then welcome to give me a second opinion" says Barbie.
"WOW! I didn't think of solving it that way. Next time my computer freaks out I'm bringing it to you." Brain says, flabbergasted.
"Anytime, amigo, anytime." Barbie says laughing.
"Brain had the same problem...
"I stayed up all night finishing up details for the design," Barbie says, laughing. "I can't wait to show them to Steven and Alex so we can start building it into a real real game!"
"I stayed up all night fini...
stfu sis.
stfu sis.

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