Feminist Hacker Barbie

Help make Computer Engineer Barbie better!

Barbie's new book tells girls they need boys to code for them.

Help Barbie be the competent, independent, bad-ass engineer that she wants to be.

Check out Casey Fiesler's, @Spacekatgal's and InfoSec Taylor Swift's adaptations for inspiration!

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User-Submitted Improvements

"So what do you think of my code?" Skipper asked Barbie, her older sister and well-respected C hacker. "Skipper... this is full of gotos." Barbie sighed. "It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Why?" asks Barbie. "And please stop trying to unplug my monitor." The element of surprise gained Skipper a momentary advantage. Wrapping her hands around Barbie's throat, the pint-sized assassin squeezed harder and harder as she held down her bucking and flailing sister. "Ken is mine," Skip whispered as Barbie's eyes went cold. "I'm so sorry, Skipper," says Barbie. "I have to run off to school now. But I promise to implement extra if-defs to make it more optimized on windows." "You better!" Skipper replies as she playfully hits barbie with a pollow. "Only the Library's computer is old enough to have a CD Drive", sighed Barbie. "Here Steven. Insert this CD into the computer while Brian tries to find the drivers from the internet." "Ugh, this merge conflict is really bad," says Barbie. "Why did they have to modify 50 files at once?" "Let me pour you some coffee, then we'll pair on resolving it, big sister," says Skipper. "The trick to a perfect high-5 is to look at the other person's elbow!" shouts Steven. "Suck it," says Barbie, "who cares about slapping hands when I just replaced the word ‘game’ with ‘poodle’ in all your IRC logs?" "I've removed the mcu on the cpu itself and soldered a custom fpga solution on the mounts. Your floating point operations will now be a quintillion times more accurate. I'm sure the event horizon simulation you were working on will finish in log(n) time." "It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "No it won't," says Barbie. "You'll waste time looking for the 'ANY' key again. Just give it here." g++ -o lib/features.os -c -O3 -Wall -fPIC -D_DEBUG_ -g -msse2 -msse3 -mfpmath=sse -mmmx -fPIC -DUSE_CV -I/usr/local/include/opencv -Ilib lib/features.cc In file included from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxtypes.h:52:0, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxcore.h:70, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cv.h:58, from lib/features.h:5, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/os_defines.h:39, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/c++config.h:275, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/bits/stl_algobase.h:60, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/vector:61, from lib/features.cc:3: /usr/include/assert.h:39:42: error: missing binary operator before token "(" /usr/include/assert.h:108:42: error: missing binary operator before token "(" In file included from /usr/include/math.h:34:0, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxtypes.h:83, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxcore.h:70, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cv.h:58, from lib/features.h:5, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/os_defines.h:39, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/c++config.h:275, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/bits/stl_algobase.h:60, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/vector:61, from lib/features.cc:3: /usr/include/bits/huge_val.h:28:18: error: missing binary operator before token "(" /usr/include/bits/huge_val.h:30:20: error: missing binary operator before token "(" In file included from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxtypes.h:83:0, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxcore.h:70, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cv.h:58, from lib/features.h:5, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/os_defines.h:39, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/c++config.h:275, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/bits/stl_algobase.h:60, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/vector:61, from lib/features.cc:3: /usr/include/math.h:392:42: error: missing binary operator before token "(" In file included from /usr/include/libio.h:62:0, from /usr/include/stdio.h:75, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/cstdio:45, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/bits/char_traits.h:46, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/ios:41, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/istream:40, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/sstream:39, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/complex:47, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxcore.hpp:53, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cxcore.h:1826, from /usr/local/include/opencv/cv.h:58, from lib/features.h:5, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/os_defines.h:39, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/i686-pc-linux-gnu/bits/c++config.h:275, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/bits/stl_algobase.h:60, from /usr/local/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.1/../../../../include/c++/4.5.1/vector:61, "Oh my gosh", said Barbie, "Someone is wrong on the internet!" "By applying the transforms laid out in my paper, we can apply several cel-shading effects that are impossible to perform efficiently with existing shaders," said Barbie. Pour mine with an extra espresso shot, sis. Some scrub decided to link directly to ATLAS instead of generic BLAS and LAPACK, so now I have to write patches to get this bullshit to link against Accelerate.framework instead. I'm not about to pollute /usr/local/lib with a bunch of stupid dependencies. This awful shared library model is why Linux can't have nice things. "So Brian rolled in here going on and on about some rookie bugs he's having," Barbie says, laughing. "I just looked at him like, 'Bro, immutable data structures'" "I'm only writing the code," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Brian's to put together all the drama!"
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