Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
What the fuck did you just fu…
"po po po po po," popo popopo. pop po po po popopo pop.
"po po po po po," popo popopo…
When Barbie opens her email on Skipper's laptop, the screen starts blinking. "Oh no!" says Barbie. "Brian accidentally sent me malware!" "I forgot to back up my homework assignment!" cries Skipper. "And all my porn files are lost, too!"
When Barbie opens her email o…
"Brian, Steven, go away," Barbie said. "I don't have time to clear your history of lesbian porn. I have work to do."
"Brian, Steven, go away," Bar…
Barbie contemplates emailing her design to Steven, but thinks better of it. "He would probably only add lesbians to the design again," says Barbie. "I learned my lesson when he gave my computer a virus while looking up porn, causing most of the coding I slaved over to be lost."
Barbie contemplates emailing …
At computer class, Barbie presents the lesbian simulator she designed. Ms. Smith is so impressed that she gives Barbie extra credit! Barbie's terrific computer skills have saved the day for all lesbians! "I guess I can be a computer engineer!" says Barbie happily, "and I can live in a home with my wife and dog."
At computer class, Barbie pre…
"OH GOD!" Steven screamed. Barbie heard her friends Steven and Brain run into the room where she was hard at work on her computer. "Barbie, help! I got a virus on my computer again and tossing hot coffee on to it only made it worse! I need your..." He stopped in his rant, eyes glued to her screen. "Um... Barbie, what exactly are you doing right now?" Barbie rolls her eyes and nonchalantly said "What does it look like I am doing? I'm Hacking into the FBI's database while simultaneously coding for my latest hardcore lesbian dating simulator!"
"OH GOD!" Steven screamed. Ba…
Brian, Steven... no interruptions! I'm busy balancing my loads. Oh and you both lost production priviledges.
Brian, Steven... no interrupt…
Congratulations on your promotion to PS NA Vice President, Starr! High-five.
Congratulations on your promo…
High-five, Starr!
High-five, Starr!
Hola Munia! Aqui te traigo este.. El software que acabo de developar para que lo cheques si está todo correctito y lo pueda validar respecto a la pinche FDA!
Hola Munia! Aqui te traigo es…
Hola! Soy Oli (Barbi IT Hero) sé que me habeis echado de menos, (Lo siento, ¡He estado muy atareada ultimamente!) pero aquí estoy de vuelta de nuevo!
Hola! Soy Oli (Barbi IT Hero)…
"The SQL injection worked!" shouted Barbie as a denial of service message flashes across the screen at Mattel.com. Steven raises his hand to hers, saying proudly, "You know, Barbie, you may have a future with ANONYMOUS!"
"The SQL injection worked!" s…
"I need some Juice, gimme gimme sista!" Barbie says while thinking of what's going to happen tonight." "Hey, Hey. I'm trying as fast a I can, don't get your wet panties in a twist."
"I need some Juice, gimme gim…
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Brian's help to turn it into a real game, I mean I'm a girl they'd understand. I gotta call Adil, Terran, and Mario soon, they promised for some BJs!" Barbie lics her lips and continues.
"I'm only creating the design…
"I'm only creating the design ideas," Barbie says, laughing. "I'll need Steven's and Brian's help to turn it into a real game, because why work on this when I can party with real men like Adil and Mario?
"I'm only creating the design…
I'm using Google to search for solutions to fix the problems I'm facing with my computer. This is motivating me to learn more about how my computer works!
I'm using Google to search fo…
"You shit-lords need to check your male privilege. Allahu akbar!", says Barbie as she buys some dank ass weed on SilkRoad.
"You shit-lords need to check…
Ms. Smith shows Barbie how to restore the files. Barbie says, "Thanks! Now I can do this anytime." Barbie then teaches Brian how to do it as well. "Thanks Barbie!," says Brian.
Ms. Smith shows Barbie how to…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "I'm only creating the design ideas right now," Barbie says, laughing, "I still have to code it to turn it into a real game!"
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"I've finished making the aesthetics edit!" exclaims Steven. "Fantastic!" says Barbie. "And all of the graphics, as well?" "I've got everything," says Steven. "Now all I have to do is replace the graphics files in my code. The game will be ready in no time!"
"I've finished making the aes…
"Hey Stevie! Thanks for designing the program, the puppies are so cute! I can go onto code it now!" says Barbie.
"Hey Stevie! Thanks for desig…
"Your robot puppy is so sweet," says Skipper. "Can I play your game?" "I'm only creating the design ideas right now," Barbie says, laughing, "I still have to code it to turn it into a real game!"
"Your robot puppy is so sweet…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "No way!" says Barbie. "I can do it myself. I just need to hook up Skipper's hard drive to the library's computer." "You're so smart Barbie!" says Steven. "The library computer has excellent security software to protect it."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Thanks for offering, but I don't need your help!" says Barbie. "Steven, the library computer has excellent security software to protect it. I have this under control." "Great idea Barbie! You're so smart." says Steven.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
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