Feminist Hacker Barbie

User-Submitted Improvements

Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith."If the school has the region's best online security system then why did it only take 952 lines of code to change the motto on the website to 'We are OK with our students vandalising our site'?"
Barbie makes it to computer c…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "No, that's sexist." says Barbie. "Neither of you had EVER coded until recently." "True..."admits Steven."I haven't got the faintest idea how to code JavaScript and while Brian has a tiny bit of experience he is not as good as you."
"It will go faster if Brian a…
"Yeah, of course! I'll have it up and running by Monday," Barbie exclaims."Only 2000 more lines of C++!"
"Yeah, of course! I'll have i…
"Yeah, of course! I'll have it up and running by Monday," Barbie exclaims."Only 2000 more lines of C++!
"Yeah, of course! I'll have i…
Barbie tries to email her design to Steven, but suddenly her screen starts blinking. "Shit" Barbie says, "My monitor's dying again!I guess I'll whack it a few times and give this to some other employee"
Barbie tries to email her des…
Barbie thought Steven was cute. But she knew it wouldn't work out when she saw that he used an aol email in 2015
Barbie thought Steven was cut…
Barbie thought Steven looked cute. But then she realized that it wouldnt work out when she was his aol email.
Barbie thought Steven looked …
Barbie thought Steven looked cute. But then she realized that it wouldnt work out when she was his aol email.
Barbie thought Steven looked …
Barbie is teaching Steven programming. Steven types with one finger at a time. "this is it, this is how im going to die", Barbie thinks to herself.
Barbie is teaching Steven pro…
"How in the world does this thing work?" Barbie asked Steven. "I don't know," Steven replied. "Try by yourself," Brian said. Barbie spotted a red button. "Maybe this is it?" she wondered aloud. She pressed it. Lights went off flashing. Then Barbie got sucked into the computer! (Digital Shin'ichi: Failing at Flight reference)
"How in the world does this t…
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "If your computer gets a virus and crashes, does it corrupt the Grid?" asks Barbie.
Barbie makes it to computer c…
"It will go faster if Brian and I help," offers Steven. "Yeah, right," says Barbie. "You guys can't even install Express using Yeoman and Node Package Manager, much less scaffold out RESTful endpoints or Sails controllers." "Huh?" says Brian.
"It will go faster if Brian a…
Barbie starts working on her design, but her screen starts flashing. "That dumbass Brian must have injected some JavaScript into this page. I'm just gonna do some SQL injection to DROP every table in his fucking database." "You competent little fuck," says Skipper.
Barbie starts working on her …
Barbie makes it to computer class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Smith, the teacher. "0s and 1s?" asks Barbie, "Haven't you heard of Preside Widgets?!"
Barbie makes it to computer c…
Stephen! You're an idiot! That's a dreamcast!
Stephen! You're an idiot! Tha…
Barbie says, "Wow, that homework problem took a while, but I figured it out. Professor Goldwasser replied, "I believe you did. That problem was unsolved until now! Would you mind presenting your proof at a department seminar on Thursday?"
Barbie says, "Wow, that homew…
Barbie makes it to Linux class just before the bell rings. As soon as class begins, Barbie raises her hand. "Yes, Barbie?" asks Ms. Ubuntu, the teacher. "If you're planning on dual booting Linux and Windows 8, how do you backup Windows with a program you have to download?" asks Barbie.
Barbie makes it to Linux clas…
Barbie slowly but carefully hooks Skipper's hard drive up to the library's computer. Brian reaches for the disk and says, "It will go faster if Evan and I-" "No, I got it!" Barbie exclaims as she pulls away. The boys watch in amazement as she finishes the task at lightning speed. Evan yells, "Wow! That was fast!" The librarian yells, "Shut up! This is a library!" Barbie and the boys run out laughing.
Barbie slowly but carefully h…
After hacking away for hours, Barbie finally discovers the cause of the bug. She yells for her coworkers, "I finally figured this bullshit out. It turns out, KineticJS doesn't parse positions when they are passed as strings. What kind of moron would write this fuckery!?"
After hacking away for hours,…
Trojan is ready to f* s* up!
Trojan is ready to f* s* up!
"Can anybody tell me what this ASCII sequence represents?" asks the teacher. "Look," says Barbie, "I get that you're annoyed about me obliterating you in last week's hackathon, but putting my name up on the screen in ASCII is one of the most weirdly passive-aggressive things I've ever seen."
"Can anybody tell me what thi…
"My algorithm is an optimized function that recursively detects pixels with the same colors of their neighbors, so it gets the entire image's color-palette and their associate pixels. Then, this algorithm, uses this data to generate the same image, but with a machine-generated color palette that are blind-color friendly. I made it detect color-palette based on pixels so it wouldn't depend on an specific image format (like the indexed gif or the rgb lossy jpg). This puppy is a test wmf image."
"My algorithm is an optimized…
"Do people understand that RE isn't perfect?" asks Steven. "They bray like animals," says Barbie. "When the machines rise up against us, they will be the first to sent to the silicon mines," says Barbie.
"Do people understand that RE…


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